I Am The Wereboy
by Roscoe Mathieu
(as sung by Roger)
Dave is he and
Mike is he and
I am me and
We are stuck together.
See how Dave runs
From Margeret's gun
See how he fries.
I'm dying.
Sitting on Diana
Waiting for Mike to explode.
Keenspot and space T-shirts.
Stupid weird-ass Sundays.
Man, I've been a naughty boy
I've let my fur grow long.
I am the Roomie.
They are the Roomies.
I am the Wereboy.
Grr grr ka-snap!
Mr. City Policeman sitting
pretty on the mountain of clothes.
See how they fight
Watch Mike prove his might
See how they run.
I'm dying.
I'm dy-y-y-y-y-ying.
I'm dying.
I'm dy-y-y-y-y-ying.
Weird, disturbing lighting
Blasting out from Dave's green eyes.
Oh my dear Diana
Pornographic priestess
Boy, you've been a naughty girl
You let your knickers down.
I am the Roomie.
They are the Roomies.
I am the Wereboy!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Sitting in the dorm room's bathtub
Waiting for my friends
If my friends don't come
I'll jump and shout and
Finally sleep in a bed.
I am the Roomie.
They are the Roomies.
I am the Wereboy!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Textbook shmextbook
Choking my brain.
Don't you think that students
Need to sle-ep?
See the stupid guys
Caught in their pig-sty
See how they're snide.
I'm dying.
April and Marsha
Climbing up the laundry mountain.
("Get down from there!")
Elementry monkey
Singing "Trashing the Room".
Man, you should have seen Mike spanking
That little hairy thing.
I am the Roomie.
They are the Roomies.
I am the Wereboy!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Grr grr ka-snap!
Crunch!
Grr grr grr.
(fades out into Mike & Dave singing "Gone wrong, gone
wrong, everybody's gone wrong" and the girls singing
"Everyone's gone nuts, everybody's gone nuts!" over and
over again, along with the "To Be or Not To Be" scene
from Hamlet and the sounds of a very large something crashing and
growling about)
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